Satuday Night, No Homework!

It's a miracle! I just turned in my homework, and wont have any more to do until I get some feedback from my instructor on Monday. So it's Saturday night, I don't have homework, and I have no idea what to do!! I think I'm a loser! But a well educated one, at least :)

I had a phone interview for a job in Phoenix this week. I'm not sure how I want it to work out. But we'll see!

The Parable of the Piano

I got my piano tuned yesterday, for the first time since I've had it! I don't know when it was tuned before that, but it's been a while, I'm guessing. There was one key that hadn't worked since I can remember, and the sustaining pedal hadn't worked in a few years either. The piano tuner guy came, and was trying to fix the key, and guess what he pulled out- a penny! It had been under the key for a really long time, he said it was even jammed into the wood from people trying to get the key to work. After he left I was playing the piano, and it was so beautiful! I was instantly a 25% better pianist! It was so easy to get everything fixed, and took less than two hours. I wondered why I had put off doing it before!

This made me think of a bit by Brian Reagan, a comedian I love. He talks about going to the eye doctor after not having been there for seven years. He puts his new glasses on and is amazed at how well he sees. "How can 'instantly improve vision' not be at the top of the to do list? Egh, I'll see tomorrow, I've got a sock drawer I need to clean out."

I think of how many times I do this. There is something in my life that isn't quite right, but it's good enough, I'm getting by, so I let it sit. And then once I fix it, I am surprised at not only how easy it was, but how much of an improvement it made. How great would it be to get all of those things fixed quickly, and not have to spend more energy on them?

The Big Two Five

I have the same birthday as my mom. Almost every year since I can remember we have spent the day together, eating out, shopping, going to a water park, whatever strikes our fancy that year. This year my mom announced that she wanted to hold off on our birthday celebration until later in the year. This leaves me with nothing to do for my birthday. I have no idea what I want to do...

So I'm turning 25. Everyone keeps saying how that is so young, but 25 just feels old! Realistically, my life is a third of the way over. This knowledge has sent me into a bit of a tailspin. I thought by the time I was 25 my life would make sense, I would know what I wanted and be on my way to getting it, but here I am, still going to to school, still having no idea what I want to do, and even less of an idea how to get there.

I saw a friend of mine from high school yesterday. It was so good to see him, it had almost been two years! He is a really talented musician, and a good teacher too, and is going to be a music teacher. There have been some road blocks for him getting his degree, but he is getting through them, and is going to be amazing. I was telling him how lucky I think he is. Not only does he have something that he has a passion for, but he is also good at it. How often does that happen? I wish I had just a small amount of what he has.

I am feeling random, and totally lost these days. I don't seem to know if I am coming or going. My life is great, it really is, but I can't help but thinking that there is more out there than what I am doing. I have this idea that some day I am going to wake up, and my life will make sense. I won't have to wonder why I am doing the things I'm doing, or if what I'm doing is getting me where I want to go, but I'm not sure that is ever going to happen. Just when I feel like I am getting a handle on life, things start shifting again.

My Middle Name

My middle name should be Procrastinator. Or maybe Whiner. It would have been more realistic. Luckily my parents had better taste than that.

My actual middle name is Ann. I'm named after my great aunt, whose name was Elizabeth Ann (little bit of trivia, I was supposed to be named Elizabeth, but when I was born, my mom thought I looked more like a Bethany, so here I am!).

I'm putting off doing homework. Hence a useless blog.

Also, I remembered today how much I freakin love San Antonio!!

Also, today is my two year anniversary of working at UoP! Two years is a really long time in Bethany years!

Oops, I Did it Again

So I have this bad habit of not being able to say no to anything. It's not that I am a push over, or that I hate letting people down, I just like to be involved, and really want to do everything. So I have the tendency to take on too much, and then complain about how stressed I am. Every time I do it, I swear it will never happen again. And then it does.

So it turns out the classes I am doubling up on are both really time consuming. Bad time to double up. And I am going to New Mexico two weekends in a row for my little sister's graduation, and to see my new niece! And my grandma is visiting. And I just got called to serve as the enrichment counselor for the Relief Society. All of these things are so exciting (other than the classes!) and I love every single one of them, but everything at the same time?? Plus work has been crazy the past couple of weeks.

I want to crawl under my bed and come out in a month when this is all over, but I have tons of stuff stored under there, and we are having an ant problem, so it wouldn't be very comfortable. I always come out of these situations just fine, so I'm sure it will work out again. And maybe this time I will learn my lesson!

Think Positive. Well, Sort Of!

I have A LOT of homework that is due tomorrow. I have done very little of it. At this time I need to do a Venn diagram on three learning theories of second language learners, and put together my presentation on language placement tests. And so I am writing a blog, of course!

Life is good. At times, I am so happy I could sing and dance around! But when I do that people point and stare, which makes me less happy, so I try not to... I just wish I wasn't so bored at work, but I'm thinking of ways to change that right now.

I was talking to my roommate last weekend about my weight gain since I moved to Texas. I was telling her that when I lived in Arizona I was the skinniest I have ever been, and yet when I looked in the mirror I only saw flaws. This made me realize that I was never going to be happy about the way I looked, so I decided to change my perspective. Even though it was SO hard, I changed the way I thought. Every time I had a negative thought about myself, I stopped and replaced it with a positive one. At first it seemed so fake, but eventually it became second nature, and I rarely have a negative thought about my body these days. When I look in the mirror I see me, and some days I even see someone beautiful, which is still strange.

This change is a really good thing, but I'm wondering if I need to give my body some tough love. I've been running lately, and I realize I have NO endurance. When I went swimming I could barely do a 50 without gasping for air. And I've gained 20 pounds. And moved up two pant sizes. I think I may have loved my body fat!

On a more positive note, I am 15 days soda free!!! Woo hoo!!!

Good News

Week 2, Day 2 of Running

I can walk! Barely...